Romance scams: how they work and how to spot them

Updated October 2026 · 4 minute read

Someone builds a relationship online for weeks or months, then has an emergency: medical bills, customs fees, a stuck inheritance, or a can't-miss investment.

How the scam works

Like almost every scam, this one follows a three step script:

1. The hook. Something believable lands in front of you: a message, a call, an ad or a new "friend".
2. The pressure. Urgency, fear, excitement or secrecy, so you act before you think or talk to anyone.
3. The payment. A method that can't be reversed: gift cards, crypto, a Bitcoin ATM, or an e-Transfer to a stranger.

Spot any one of those three steps and you can stop the whole thing.

Red flags to watch for

What to do if it happens to you

If you already paid or shared details

1. Call your bank or card issuer right away and ask them to stop or reverse the payment.
2. Change any password you entered, and turn on two step verification.
3. Report it to the Canadian Anti-Fraud Centre (1-888-495-8501) in Canada, or reportfraud.ftc.gov in the US.
4. File a police report and keep every message, receipt and screenshot.
5. Watch out for "recovery" offers. Anyone promising to get your money back for a fee is running a second scam.

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